Aliens: The Tim Torture
by Corpral Hicks
Summary: *Repost*A short story crossover with Home Improvement. Tool Time is doing an On Location show on the Planet LV:852. The Hive wont want what it gets!Read and Reveiw.


Disclaimer: I do no own the Aliens product, that belongs to 20th Century Fox and the Home Improvement product belong to Disney and Touchstone.  
  
  
Aliens: The Tim Torture  
  
     "Does everyone know what time it is?" asked a woman. She was wearing a short   
skirt.  
        "Tool Time!" two men said in unison, popping their heads in front of the camera.  
         "That's right. Binford Tools is proud to present Tim 'the Tool Man' Taylor," the   
woman told the camera.  
       "Thank you Heidi. I am Tim 'the Tool Man' Taylor and this is my over-qualified and overweight assistant, Al Borland!" a man with brown hair told the camera.  
       "That's right Tim and today we are on location on LV:852 at the Weyland-Yutani mining colony," Al Borland said, " now today we understand that this Colony is having Xenomorph problems."  
     "And we are here to get rid of the resin for the colony survivors," Tim said, " you see the resin can give you tools and furniture a musky smell as well as sometimes rotting whatever it's covering!"  
     Tim walked over to the nearest wall and broke off a piece of resin.  
     "Now you see the resin also warms up its surroundings," Al went on, "which can be hell if you don't have a fan!"  
     Tim walked back in front of the camera, "now before we install the fans," Tim continued, "we will remove the resin!"  
    "Now because we haven't had much experience with this resin we are going to try using a sander!" Al stated.  
    "Yes, but not any old sander," said Tim, as Al lets out a moan in the background, " I have super-charged the Binford Sander 6150. Heidi: bring out the sander."  
    Heidi walked up to Tim holding a tool, "here you go, Tim."  
    Thanking Heidi, Tim walked up to the nearest resin-covered wall, placed the sander on the wall and pressed the "on" button.  
    The bottom of the sander started moving and the resin started to wear away. Smoke started coming out of the sander, then it exploded sending Tim flying into Al.  
    Just as the sander exploded, one of the walls burst open. Tim looked at what had come through the wall.  
    "Oo oo oo a oow," Tim said in a deep, grunting voice, "a Ford APC, ooo, three hundred and twenty horse powered engine! Oo oo oo a oow!"  
    The side door of the APC slid open and a marine walked out.  
    "I am sorry to interrupt this program but there is a major Xenomorph infestation here and all the colonists are dead," the marine told the TV crew, "quick get in the APC! Come on. GO GO GO!"  
     Tim and Al made a move for the APC when two pairs of arms shot out of the resin covered wall. They grabbed Tim and pulled him up with ease. The pair that grabbed Al were struggling to pull him up.  
     "Tim! Al!" Heidi shouted after seeing them pulling through the wall.  
     "No Ma'am, they are gone! DRIVER! GO GO GO!" the marine shouted.  
      The APC turned and shot through the hole in the wall to safety.  
  
***  
  
Tim woke up and looked beside him. He was suspended on the wall and Al...well… Al was about to fall off the wall. Tim looked on the floor and there was what appeared to be a lifeless hand. Al seemed to have a hand on his face.  
    "Hey Wilson?" Tim shouted.  
    "Hi-de-ho, neighbour. What can I do for you?" someone answered. A man popped his head up from behind a nearby egg. Half his face was still obscured by the egg but it could be seen that he was wearing a hat.  
     "Wilson, I think I am in trouble. What are these things?" Tim asked Wilson.  
    "Well Tim I think these are the Xenomorphs and I think you just became baby food!" Wilson told Tim in a blunt voice.  
     "What? So what is going to happen to me?" Tim asked worriedly.  
     "Well in about four to six hours a worm like creature will eat its way out of your chest," Wilson told him, "and you will die in the process!"  
      Tim looked around the room and saw the other people hanging from the wall. Most off them had a hole in their chest. Some still had a hand-like creature on there face like Al.  
One man at the side of Tim started to convulse and throwing his chest in the air. His chest started to bulge and a ripping and tearing noise filled the room. A worm-like creature emerged from the big hole in the man's chest.  
     A big black creature came into the room and picked up the worm creature that had fallen to the floor. The black creature put the worm back into the hole in the man's chest. A harsh sound echoed around the room. The worm was eating.  
    Once the worm had finished eating, the black creature picked it up and walked out of the room.  
    "OH MY GOD! Is that what is gonna happen to me?" Tim asked, horrified.  
    "Yes! I think that is what is going to happen." Wilson said.  
    Something inside the egg in front of Wilson started to move. The top of the egg started to peel open like the petals of a bud opening. The hand-like creature crawled out and sat on the edge of the egg. Wilson's eyes widened and the hand leapt onto his face just in time to muffle his scream.  
     Tim blacked out.  
  
***  
  
Tim awoke to a burning pain in his chest. He looked down to see blood filling his shirt. His chest started to bulge and Tim screamed, Tim quickly looked round to see if he could find Wilson.   
    Wilson was glued to the wall next to him, where the dead man had previously been. Tim screamed again and twisted in agony. As Tim twisted he saw Al starting convulse.  
    A cracking sound filled Tim ears and he looked down to the see the last thing he would ever see. A large worm came out of his chest.  
    The worm came crashing to the ground when another worm came out of Al.   
Tim's worm turned to face Al's worm, "I had to wait an hour or two for you! You best be grateful you fat lump!" the Worm said in mind speech.  
    Al's worm looked at Tim's worms, "well I had a lot to eat to get out! Do you realise how fat he is? He could feed the whole hive, Tim'olia!"  
    "All right, Al'binis. Keep your pants on!" Tom'olia said.  
    Another black creature came into the room and picked up the two worms.  
    "Fancy any food you two?" the creature asked.  
    "No thank you, Kill'hiss!" Tim'olia replied.  
    In a few days Tim'olia and Al'binis had grown into warrior drones. The Xenomorph from Wilson had also grown to be the wisest warrior drone in the hive.  
    Tim'olia was at the hive entrance with what appeared to be human tools. He was using them to do something to hive entrance.  
    "Tim'olia what are you doing?" Al'binis asked walking up behind him.  
   "I am super-charging the hive door I put in yesterday!" Tim'olia explained.  
   "Remember what happened yesterday when her eggs were crushed when the door broke off?" Wil'soniss said from around the corner. Wil'soniss had half of his head hidden behind the door.  
    "Won't worry," Tim'olia said, "absolutely nothing can go wrong!"  
    Tim'olia pressed something he was holding in his hand and a huge explosion sounded throughout the hive.  
    "TIM'OLIA!" The Queen shouted.  
     "My bad!" was Tim'olia's only answer. 


End file.
